Welcome to my blog

For my huge fan base out there I know you have been more then patient waiting for me to fill you in on my hugely busy life here out on the Canadian Prairies. My first bit of business is to make sure that the maple leaf is clearing visible to the naked eye and also in braille. This is my first try at blogging so my main goal is to not make this an internet version of the Christmas letter that goes out every year letting everyone know about how successful their children are vs. your children who are probably on meds of some kind and you are just thankful that you had enough funds and were codependent enough to post bond for your wayward child who started a meth lab in your basement. You of course are now living with your elderly parents since the minor explosion that blew up your house. The stress must be getting to you hiding from the staff of the retirement village where your parents live, because they don't take too kindly to sleep overs that last more then a month.

My hope of this blog is to share with you in excruciating detail how I am dealing with living in a foreign country where I am trying desperately to learn their language, lesson one for you all - a chesterfield is not a cigarette but another name for a couch or a sofa. I know, I know you must be thinking to yourself, what a brave woman, trying to learn a new language, start a new relationship and realize that even though I am a US citizen I am not allowed to send in my video to try and compete in the next Survivor. Yes I have given up much to move to this land where they have daily updates on when the snowmobile trails will be open.

Sure some of you might say hey, I've moved to foreign places and done just fine, I've moved from Northern California to let's say Florida or Virginia and you don't see me whining about the troubles I faced. And I say to you, then start your own blog cause this is mine.

Since I am supposed to be talking about my experiences in Canada I suppose I should start at some point, otherwise this will just become the ramblings of a woman whose meds always seem to be off just a tich.

So today we are waiting for the Salvation Army (which is probably bigger then the Canadian armed forces but don't say anything to them about that cause they get a bit cranky and I am on a visitors visa you know) to pick up our old furniture. They will arrive sometime between 9am and 5pm, which warms my heart with memories of waiting for the cable guy to come to install cable TV so I too could have 300 channels of which 260 of them were shopping channels or sports channels of sports that I don't watch.

Oh yeah - any comments stating that hockey is silly will get you kicked out of the country. For those of you who have problems with insomnia I suggest watching a thrilling match of curling. There is nothing more relaxing then watching curling and then have a slow motion replay of some move with the "heavy hard" moves of the broom.

We have snow up here. Where in the northwest if we have snow in the low lands it is an event and the newscasters always throw up some graphics like - SNOW DISASTER 2006. The inch of snow that falls shuts the city down. The newbie reporters are stuck on some freeway overpass saying "Well Jan we just had some snow mixed with rain come down" and then they reach down and grab a handful of snow like we never have seen snow before and say "but at the moment it is just raining. We will keep you updated as this weather continues to worsen".

Up here the snow falls, it stays for 6 months. In January everyone in Canada goes to Mexico for vacation so George W, if you wanted to invade this would be the time, just an fyi. I mean snow is just no big deal, it just goes on and on and on. They have 1.6 blizzards every winter, so I am looking forward to that, though as of yet I don't know the difference between blowing snow and blizzard.

Oh yeah and when it gets past -20 celsius that means your snot is going to freeze and you had better not stick any frozen metal in your mouth.

If you have braces - big old sorry for you.

So that is my first entry. If you would like to comment and use words like, "amazing or edge of the seat suspenseful or, I laughed so hard I blew out my gall bladder and ended up in the hospital for a week," I would appreciate it.

If by chance you are an english teacher, librarian (mother) or professional writer (daddy) and feel this overwhelming urge to correct my punctuation or grammar, don't even think about it.

Not bad eh?

talk to you soon.

Claudia