Ticks are red with little with lots of legs. They do not get big until they have sucked up what remaining blood is left by the bastard mosquitoes of the Northern plains.If you have big hair it is suggested you wear a hat and not a beehive bouffant into the fields and grassy areas of the prairies.
If you come home and are sitting watching TV and one drops from your hair to your arm after coming back from an outing in the above mentioned landscape what you do is:
Grab it by your fingers and ask your partner or friend what a tick looks like. Once told, you scream and go, oh fuck, oh shit this is so fucking gross and you run outside and throw it cause you don't want to pinch it between your nails, because then you will have tick juice and that is even worse.
Then you stomp back inside and ask, why didn't you tell me there are fucking ticks here? Why am I the last to know?
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