Getting Married

Haven't been around for awhile. Well I've been around, but I've been busy with this getting married thing. In the states other then that damn liberal state of Massachusetts, us people who are of the same sex can't get married. But here I am in this one country on the North American Continent that believes in equal rights and hockey and I am getting married. Like tomorrow. I'm getting married. There are things we had to think of before we got married that straight people don't have to think about much. The big one is:

Who to invite. Sure your friends and family. But you really want to make sure that anyone you invite will blow bubbles not throw stones. To clarify when I talk about blowing bubbles what I mean is, those little blowing bubble things that you give people to blow when you walk down the aisle aftewards. Not the God your guests so drunk before the wedding and look at them, sitting in a stuper with those gross little spittle bubbles coming out of their half parted lips.

Plus bubbles are better then throwing rice cause that isn't cool anymore cause the birds eat it and blow up in mid air that can really screw the dinner afterwards. Sure I could dodge a few small stones no problem but I sure as hell wouldn't invite some 8 foot giant homophobe who can toss a boulder or two our way.

But how do you know if the people you invite are going to freak on ya? I was pretty upfront. I said, hey we are getting married, wondering if you would like to come and by the way are you going to freak if you see two women kiss? Cause I found out you have to kiss to like seal the deal, sort of like Tupperware but without the burp.

Also finding a minister that will do it is totally necessary. Clue for anyone who is getting married - the United Churches are the hip and cool churches to use. We found a Pastor named Kim, so we call her Pastor Kim, or Kim or her HipHop nickname is KP that's how hip she is. This is also her first same sex wedding so she said that the other Pastor she works with will be so jealous.

Once you get the pastor, then you have to go through marriage counseling which isn't harsh but they ask all sorts of personal questions about sex and do you love each other and do you both just love the Canadian show http://www.cornergas.com/, cause I guess if you don't just love it they won't marry you. Interestingly enough I found out the only family member you can marry in Saskatchewan is your cousin, much like most of the Southern United States. So if you are gay and marrying your gay cousin, this is the place to do it. They also have no restriction against farm animals that I know of, at least they never mentioned that you can't marry them when we went to get our marriage license. Again like most of the Southern United States, unless they are gay farm animals, then that is totally disgusting and against the law.

So you are saying to yourself, got the pastor, found non stone throwing people to attend where do you have it?

At Kim and Tom's place. It is very beautiful and Tom just built a new fence that has 98 pre-drilled, countersunk screws in every eight foot section (this information was provided to me through an unnamed source within the Tom and Kim household). So it can with stand any drive by stone throwing homophobe giants.

Ya got the pastor, the people and the place, how about food and wedding wings (I meant rings but it sounds funny eh - wedding wings)?

Go to a' la Carte owned by Beth Traynor 525-0501. She rocks her place is in the Cathedral area which is the only hip area in Regina and she put up with us because we kept finding non stone throwing friends who wanted to attend. And you know that her food is good and you can trust that no one will be spitting in the food before it is served.

Finally you want rings, by now you are realizing that weddings aren't cheap but you have to have rings that are cool. Well you go to http://www.mysteria.ca/. Marlo who is one of the owners is absolutely one of the most rocking people around and we found cool rings that are silver and classy with a little diamond in it, not like some rings that have more diamonds in them then a poor African country can produce in a year. Oh yeah and Mysteria is also in the Cathedral area so as you can tell the Catherdral area is the place to be seen - that is why I shop at the Catherdal Safeway.

Some of you might ask, why go through the hassle of doing this? Isn't living together as common law enough, why do you have to be so out there and political and stuff. Well other then the obvious reason is that we love each other and want to be together the rest of our lives. It is because of:

the gifts
and the party with friends and family that you love.

In some respects straight and gay people aren't too different.